News links: children under mother published family under Magazine November 2003, (Xia half months) published has one Tsinghua brilliant student of mother of signed article, said of is a boy since childhood obediently walking in Kochi parents for its arrangements of \"broad road\" Shang, special obedient, special filial, and in its finally distribution to large organs work of a years Hou, is determined to became one stray singer. Mother earnestly advise [exhort] not listening, he said: everything is in the past mother arranged, I only have \"execute\"; now I finally have the opportunity to live for yourself, do the things they want to do, I will not give up this chance.
Mother son cannot figure why the transition from special good Shun as particularly rebellious, anxious heart attack twice. Do not know if she would like to see the problem: why children suddenly when he was 54 years old to take the road of a rebellion?
Never needs to support children\'s growth, but once the support becomes too much intervention. Many young mothers, in the children a little knowledge of the world, keen to \"press\", is keen to perform to SB. \'s baton arrangements, supervision, and command, control, slightly from chizhiwei not \"wasted time\", \"worthless\", with a view to let your child avoid detours. Everyone knows, the results of excessive intervention from the start, imprison independent thinking, independent choice of the development of the child.
Children are small, is also independent of the person also has independent consciousness, is not to accept the parents \' excessive intervention of the fork. Most offensive intervention of children include:
Intervention on the schedule. 4 year old girl jingjing complained: \"MOM every day to meet me at the kindergarten, we know that rush me to hurry home practice, did not play carousel and slide. My good friends are playing, I want to play, but Mom always straight face do not make. ”
Interest on selected interventions. A children\'s Palace says Qiu in charge of interest classes registration: application at a time, piano, violin, painting, calligraphy and go classes are full, martial arts, gymnastics, reading, and so are often too few applications can\'t open class. \"A lot of top class children is clearly adults wish prevails. Lots of little boys who like chenglonglilianjie, martial arts, but most of them also had to learn the piano. ”
Intervention on the aesthetic intuition. Long years of counselling in teacher of children\'s art, fear most to open running day, \"especially the parents of a little art knowledge the most trouble, once you have the opportunity to sit by children watching him paint, just pointing should should always do, hate cannot steal a crayon to do. Child painting pleasure alone were destroyed. ”
Intervention for reading on the subject. In Bookstore purchase books often see such of scene: children wanted to selected science fiction, and insects, and dinosaur, and car, and myth, and military aspects of picture book, parents is Association to they placed back shelf or in cashier Qian withdrawal off, since said since words to plus Ruby reading, and children\'s English, and idiom story, puzzle and the inspirational story, because they think, which is \"useful of\" reading, and \"is zoned from\" of reading.
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All this, and so on. Negative effects of excessive intervention to children include at least:
Children especially are not confidence, within, strong dependency. Parents often in judging and selecting more die on behalf of the blister, over time, children will lose their independence of judgement, ability to choose. Only do one of the soldiers when they grow up, is also a poor soldiers, not to mention talented teachers, more from doing a born Commander.
Children become particularly Rove, inefficient. Especially parents when a child schedule on the \"press\", will the children eventually develop a habit: as long as no one on the sidelines watching his body relaxed, distraction, and desertion. Hours not knowing how to win the man of leisure by efficiency, big, all critical things most likely to become \"postponed\" lazy people.
Children especially treason. Some children may at that time, rebel, spend a lot of time with their parents protest; some other child was the obedient good Shun, but against the savings of energy still in his heart, to shots of the stage, such as puberty, such as after graduating, he suddenly changes to a certain person you want to run away from the parents \' will, as previously referred to street singer.
You don\'t want to see your child become like this? So, everyone who loves implementation of the excessive intervention of parents to their children, should ask ourselves:
Have I will impose my own dream children?
Do I have excessive anxiety due to excessive expectations?
Are placed on the child\'s family look forward to shoulder, his fair? He also left how much time and effort to realize their dreams?
Is a depressed genius or a happiness of ordinary people, suffering from more comfort we raise?
Fundamentally speaking, implementation of the excessive intervention of parents to their children, are looking forward to excessive and abandon the parents themselves in varying degrees, their most fundamental question, does not understand \"children will have his own life\"; also, we have to have their own lives. So in addition to raising children, with your career aspirations and social circle, is one of the effective way of avoiding excessive intervention on children.
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